INTPs will say anything to get a reaction and tend to have fairly dark humor. My INTP friends have said many horrible things with a straight face, not excluding approval of slavery and blowing up the planet. However, take their critiques and ideas 100%…
please do take time to read this my dear friends. it will help, I promise. :’D
Dont tell him hes cute, thats what im for. Dont touch him, I will destroy you. Dont smile at him, ill break your jaw. Dont flirt with him. Dont ask to chill with him. Dont like his pictures. Dont text him. Dont think about him. Dont try to be friendly with him.Dont even breathe around him.
Okay, I might be a little paranoid, crazy, and have trust issues but thats because girls are scandalous, manipulative spawns of the devil.
THE NEW PRIEST - by http://hennievandyk.bravepages.com/jokes.html
A new priest at his first Mass was so scared he could hardly speak. After the service he asked the monseigneur how he had done "Fine - but next week it might help you if a little Vodka or Gin was put in you water to relax you". The next week the new priest put Vodka in his water and really kicked up a storm. After Mass he asked the Monseigneur how he had done this time. "Fine" he said "but next week there are a few things you should correct".
There are 10 commandments - not twelve There are twelve disciples not ten David slew Goliath - he didn’t kick the shit out of him We don’t refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C. Next Saturday there will be a taffy contest at St. Peter’s, not a peter pulling contest at St. Taffy’s The Father, Son and the Holy Ghost are not Big Daddy, Junior and Spook Moses parted the water at the Red Sea - he did not pass water We do not refer to Judas as El Finko The Pope is consecrated - not castrated and we do not refer to him as the Godfather When the multitude were fed with loaves and fishes Jesus did not mention chips
(Note:she is silent through the transaction, which includes a gift card.)
Me:“How much would you like on this?”
Customer:“Oh, sorry. Can I have $150?”
Customer:*after paying* “Can you do me a favor?” *she hands me the gift card* “The next customer you see that you think could use this, could you give it to them?”
Me:*stunned* “…Of course!”
(After a minute another customer comes up, a visibly upset young woman.)
Me:“Hi! How are you?”
Customer #2:“I’m okay, thanks.”
(Clearly she is not ok, but she is trying very hard to be pleasant. She is getting very basic items:milk, bread, eggs, etc. Nothing very festive.)
Me:“So your total comes out to $0.00.”
Me:“The person before you gave me a $150 gift card to use for the next person I thought could use it. You look like you’re having a rough day, so here are your groceries, and there’s about $130 left on this card.”
(The customer just started crying. Once she could, she thanked me about 100 times. Made my whole Christmas season.)
“Ich schreibe anders als ich rede, ich rede anders als ich denke, ich denke anders als ich denken soll und so geht es weiter bis ins tiefste Dunkel.”—Franz Kafka in einem Brief an seine Schwester (1914)
“We need to stop pitting girls against each other. We need to stop giving validation to novels and films that fetishize girls who say they “aren’t like other girls” as if there’s something inherently wrong with being a girl. We need to stop perpetuating the fallacy of the mythical “other girls” who all fit some made up stereotype that we teach our girls to be afraid of because “the right guys” don’t actually like “that kind of girl”. “That kind of girl” doesn’t exist, because girls are people and not objects that come in bulk.”—werivalourcreation (via maytheodds)
“In Jesus Christ there is no isolation of man from God or of God from man. Rather, in Him we encounter the history, the dialogue, in which God and man meet together and are together, the reality of the covenant MUTUALLY contracted, preserved, and fulfilled by them. Jesus Christ is in His one Person, as true GOD, MAN’S loyal partner, and as true MAN, GOD’S. He is the Lord humbled for communion with man and likewise the Servant exalted to communion with God.”—― Karl Barth, The Humanity of God
In 1 Corinthians we find a verse that tells women to be silent in church. however, this verse breaks the whole flow of the text, and is therefore said to have been added later by men, who wanted control. you don’t believe me? read for yourself.
26 What then shall we say, brothers and sisters? When you come together, each of you has a hymn, or a word of instruction, a revelation, a tongue or an interpretation. Everything must be done so that the church may be built up. 27 If anyone speaks in a tongue, two—or at the most three—should speak, one at a time, and someone must interpret. 28 If there is no interpreter, the speaker should keep quiet in the church and speak to himself and to God.
29 Two or three prophets should speak, and the others should weigh carefully what is said. 30 And if a revelation comes to someone who is sitting down, the first speaker should stop. 31 For you can all prophesy in turn so that everyone may be instructed and encouraged. 32 The spirits of prophets are subject to the control of prophets. 33 For God is not a God of disorder but of peace—as in all the congregations of the Lord’s people.
36 Or did the word of God originate with you? Or are you the only people it has reached? 37 If anyone thinks they are a prophet or otherwise gifted by the Spirit, let them acknowledge that what I am writing to you is the Lord’s command. 38 But if anyone ignores this, they will themselves be ignored.[h]
39 Therefore, my brothers and sisters, be eager to prophesy, and do not forbid speaking in tongues. 40 But everything should be done in a fitting and orderly way.
This is much more coherent and logical, than the text with the verse we use in our churches. it’s impossible to prove that the text was edited indeed, but I believe this is enough reason to assume that this is what happened.
Thanks to Dr Rainey who was as kind as to point this out to us. all credits go to him :)